Goodbye to my love Koji 02/07/2007 - 12/28/2018

The silence of my sadness can no longer be heard by the Paws that no longer exist.

Goodbye to my love Koji 02/07/2007 - 12/28/2018

 While this blog might bring tears and sadness please know that he filled my heart with so much love.  He was like me...a complicated soul.  We both keep things deep inside in order to not hurt others.  He could be a little stinker as his whole life was spent "guarding things".  We even had to save special things for him to guard so he would not yip his high pitch tone over and over.  Once we gave him a bag of chips or can of nuts he was good for the night.  Homer our bulldog knew the rules.  Even though they had some pretty intense fights they loved each other.  They were like 2 brothers.  I wrote this poem below this morning.  I miss him very much and always will.  He is my second "Hobo".
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Bart and Koji 2007

I held you as a puppy and again at the end,
I loved you from day one and completely at the end,
I cleaned up after you as a puppy and then again at the end,
My heart burst with love when I met you  and shattered at the end.                            
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~I felt your heart beat as a puppy
Fast and strong as could be,
Then the last day came and I held you
Until the very last beat.

I wonder as I turn to see your bed
Where did you really go,

Not your physical body
but your soul... how am I to know?

I imagine you're with my other dogs            
Hobo the first Bart the last,
Running in fields with them
And barking about the past.




Your pictures sit beside me                                    

On the table by my chair,
I even have a lock of your beautiful
Shiba hair.


I think of you so often

That I forget you are gone,
My heart is filled with longing
But your memory will carry me on.

I know we will meet again
and shed lots of happiness tears,
For God loved me so much
That he let you stay for 12 years.

No one will ever take your place
For there is only one YOU,
Encased in my heart in a special place
Saved for the very few.

I can see you in my mind                                                                 
Looking at my face,
And I intend to keep that memory
Permanently in a safe.

Someday we will meet again
In that beautiful perfect place,
But until then I will continue
To remember your beautiful face.

Mama loves you Koji
With all my Heart and Soul,
Thank you for your years of love
And memories that never grow old.

Yes you were a difficult dog
Guarding bags of chips and containers of nuts,
But during it all we managed
To get through all the ruts!

I will continue to love you
In the past, present and future,
Please stay in my memory always
And keep watch over me till I hold you again.

In loving memory
Koji 2/2007 - 12/2018

Working on my Ireland Vacation Story!

Dear Nana,
I wanted to write you a letter that I could add pictures to.  I hope this works.  I wanted to

save the memories that I had in Ireland as I know that it will slowly fade away as all things do.  Not completely but you know how exciting it is than life gets in the way again.  I will share pictures along the way.  I don't know how long it will become but no matter.  First off as I write I have been up since 3am again.  Today is the second full day back in Washington.  I love where I live but when I think of where I want to go for Vacation Ireland is on my brain! As I sit here I am watching one of my humming birds in the morning light eating at the feeder.  He is flying around and looking in at me.  It is still dark outside but the sky is light enough to wake him up.  You see after I left the feeders went dry.  I filled them up yesterday.  They will be empty by tomorrow.  Some of them stay all winter so I keep it up.  If it gets too cold it will freeze so I put a light with a really warm bulb on it... to keep it from freezing.  In this journal I will not start new paragraphs.  I want it to just be all one letter. My journey to Ireland was unexpected as I had no idea that Blaithin and Andrew would ask me to go.  What a brilliant idea. I am no longer scared to fly that far.  I realize that it is a fear that I have had for years but can overcome.  I had no problem going there or coming back.  The landing are the worst if anything was rough.... but you need to get down somehow! Cianna and I had a great trip back. She never slept one wink!  I kept dozing off but would wake up because a baby was crying or the kids in the right front isle to us would out of the blue start fighting.  That is a story in itself. So here goes my stories!  First off you must know that this family sat across from the people in front of us.  I could see the man on the end (the father).  He was a little chubby - I guess Vinny's size.  That was fine until he bent over.  OMG. I saw his crack so many times.  I had to hold a magazine up once or twice... ok 5+ times to hide his crack.  It was a shock for sure.  Thank GOD that Cianna did not see it.... she would have laughed and commented about his BUM for sure!  The family had 2 boys and the Nana along.  I did not see much of them but it would be funny when all of the sudden the 6 year old would yell... "OH MY GOD... HE JUST MADE ME LOSE!!! " You see they were playing video games. The Nana at one point asked why he would all the sudden have a melt down.  I just sat there and thought.... I am on vacation but if he was in Mercer Island he would be one of my kiddos!!  It was funny to me... but I am sure the parents were going nuts!! I kind of made friends with the Nana. She was directly in front of me. I tapped her one time to tell her to look out the window.  She was sitting with an Asian lady who kept the window blind shut.  (When I was at the bathroom I heard her asking the stewardess where she could go to see out of the plane.) She came over and looked out my window.  They kept looking for iceland or greenland... can't remember which. So I invited her to look out our window.  When she came over the father did too.  I also let his sons look.  I guess I am telling you how we became friends in the end. When the flight was getting ready to desend  Cianna said out loud "Are we there yet?"  He turned to me and laughed telling me that he has been hearing that from his boys for 9 hours!  This is what he ended up telling me.  They were from London and on their was to San Francisco.  They were going to Disney Land... Vegas.. the Grand Canyon then on their way to other places.  The lady in front of me was his wife's mother and he was originally from LA.  He had a London Accent and was very nice.  I just did not enough the plumber crack pose! Ok it is 6:30am here and I need to get things in order and ready to go see Cianna.  I stayed home yesterday to recover and get my mind in order.  I feel better today for sure! 

He listens.....

My story starts out a couple of weeks ago. I put up a feeder to attract Hummingbirds...they are a passion of mine. I have been waiting for days to have a hummingbird come visit... but none have come by. On Sunday I went to home depot and bought two fushia plants to attact these small miracles. Nothing ... no birds..... nothing. If you know me well you know that I am not a patient person but I am learning as life will teach you the hard way if you just can't grasp this concept.

Today I sat out in the sun enjoying the beautiful day and thanking God for the sun. I also prayed that he would guide me in my job to be successful and help me figure out where I should be.

I decided to email some people and do some chores so I went into the house. As I sat at the table on my computer I kept hearing a small chirp...and looked up to see my FIRST HUMMINGBIRD!! I believe in signs. I believe that my prayer was heard. I know that God hears our prayers. He loves me and will guide me. Just wanted to share and tell all of you that I am here to help you if you ever need me.

Hugs and love to you all ~ Nancy Ulrich

They say hummingbirds are a symbol for accomplishing that which seems impossible and will teach you to find the miracle of joyful living from your own life circumstances. They are a symbol of peace, love and happiness.

My life is full today and I want to thank God for sending a small miracle to cheer me up and enrich my life.

Teaching Cianna

I have decided to keep a log on teaching Cianna. There are so many things that she does that touch my heart and surprise me! I never thought that my life would be so content in my job. At this time in my life I find it hard to even call it a "Job". Cianna is part of my life and I am so thankful that Andrew and Blaithin trust me to teach and care for Cianna.

I will add a short story on how I met Cianna. I answered an ad to be a part time Nanny in Mercer Island. I did not know that Cianna had special needs. I knew that they were looking for someone that would be consistent and patient so I called and met with them. I can not believe how easy it was to meet Cianna. I felt at peace when I met their family and it has been a wonderful adventure ever since. Cianna is like the little sister I never had but always wanted.

I will be keeping a teaching log but also using this to remember the little things that she does that touch my heart and teach me everyday to remember all the things that we take for granted. I am so grateful that I was lead to the Solan home and believe that this was no mistake in my destiny. I trust in my instincts and believe that this was intuition at work.

Cianna is going to NBA now. She works with Eileen who is very patient and a great teacher. She has been going for about 10 weeks and is doing very well. I will also add all the appointments that she has and add details for my teaching in this log.

Thursday July 21 -
Marianne 8-9 am Seattle. Breakfast . Teaching ABA Home therapy 10-12. Lunch. NBA Bellevue 1230-215pm. We also ate Mexican food today in Mercer Island. Cianna was very grown up at Lunch. She ate everything on her plate and "shared" her chips with me. I guess I must have been eating too many because she moved the chips to her side and let me know that they were hers. She gave me a specific amount of chips on my napkin that I was allowed to eat. We talked about how proud I was that she was sharing. At the very end of our meal Cianna was drinking from a glass with a straw. I told her to be careful because she was going to spill her water. She lowered the glass and dropped it under the table. I think she was very surprised that it broke. She got upset until I moved over to her side and hugged her and told her that we could get more water. I was surprised that she recovered so quickly. Usually she will go on and on about what happened and continued to be very upset. We promptly left so they could clean up the glass. Over all it was a wonderful experience to sit with her and have lunch at the restaurant. We went home and she wanted to swing in the back yard. The wind started to blow so I was talking to her about the wind. We talked about how you can not see the wind but you can hear it.... feel it......and see the trees moving. She than said "it needs to stop winding!" She awakens my soul when she says the most innocent things like this.

Here is another thing that she did one day when we were on the freeway. We were driving and she got very upset and kept saying "GET DOWN" "GET DOWN"! I could not figure out what she was talking about until I saw a tow truck that had a car on it. She was very upset and said "Cars DO NOT go on Cars!" How interesting that we just take things for granted and she is right.... Cars don't go on other cars! She is like a mystery to me that I try to understand and solve. I love her just the way she is!

Friday July 22 -
Bath - new toy Sponge Bob watering can. We will only use for bathtime. She used it to rinse her body. We also talked about how plants grow when you water them. She responded very well to rinsing her body with the watering can.

Cleo 750-850. She rode her bike and did Yoga and other PT things.

Breakfast 9-10 / NBA Home Therapy 10-12 / Lunch 12-1 /

He listens....

About a week ago I put up my Hummingbird feeder. Hummingbirds are a passion of mine and these small miracles bring so much joy to my life. I see so many of them in Seabeck Washington at my mom and dad's house. I have not seen any in my back yard in Bellevue Washington. I decided to buy two fushia plants and put them beside the feeder in hopes of attracting them. I have been waiting since Sunday. For those of you that know me.... I was not blessed with patience. I have found in life if you don't embrase this quality life will teach you to accept it!
Today as I sat on my porch staring at the feeder I prayed that God would help me with my career and direct me towards my path. I have been frustrated and need direction. After sitting in the sun for a bit I needed to get up and do some chores and start my day. As I sat at the table emailing clients I keep hearing a chirp and when I looked up SHE WAS THERE! My first hummingbird. This was a sign to me that God heard me and the joy I got from seeing that little bird filled my day with hope and joy. If the smallest of birds can give me this much happiness - imagine what life will bring if I welcome each day and do my best. I know God listens to me and will help me through tough time.

They say the Hummingbird is a symbol for accomplishing that which seems impossible and will teach you to find the miracle of joyful living from your own life circumstances. She is a symbol of peace, love and happiness.

Hugs to you all I love my life and all who are a part of it. Enjoy the SUN!!

~Nancy Ulrich

I just can't say Goodbye to you......

May 30, 2010

There is never an easy time to say goodbye to someone that you love. Most don't know the day they will leave this earth. We know that this is his last weekend on earth at least in a physical body. I do believe those we love really never leave us they are always near us even if we don't know it. Those feelings you get that "someone" is near but no one is there... when you turn around and think you are not alone... and when you get prompted to do something out of the blue... I believe this is them.

I have known him for 5 years and have never heard him say anything bad about ANYONE. He lights up the room when he comes in no matter what the situation. He is the most loyal guy and loves unconditionally. You could never pay for this kind of friendship and dedication.

He is not perfect and has problems like stealing your socks on occasion. He ate my dinner once when I went into the other room to get something (man I was mad that day it was a steak!). The first time I ever met him I was bent over the bar talking to Mike when he decided to "take a ride".... I have never seen him do that again to anyone!

By this time I am sure you have guessed that he is a dog. Bart is the most perfect roommate you could ever have. Only wants to be loved and cared for... and even that is very minimal. He is the most gentle dog I have ever met and the biggest Golden Retriever I have ever seen. He will leave us before he turns 7 as he will not make it till July.

What is so ironic about his life is that Mike was looking for a Golden with a big head and big body. He found a puppy with a HUGE head. A lovable strong and huge Golden. Now his head is what will take his life. He has Cancer in his entire sinus system. My heart breaks as I watch him in his last days....his body is failing but his spirit lives on. He is still "the kid" inside.

I have often wondered in my life why the best and sweetest have to suffer so much. Why very kind and wonderful people have to die and others that make us question humanity live on. This is not for me to understand in this lifetime I guess. I also know that we all have a mission in life and when it is fulfilled me move on. I have tried in my lifetime to "bargain" with God - Take me and please let them stay. I guess God does not work like that because I am still here and those people I wanted to trade places with are gone.

I will always love you Bart and remember you forever. Your memories will live on and no Golden will every take your place. No other Dog could. From my heart to yours..... I can't say Goodbye... so I will say see you on the other side Bartholomew.


Nancy Ulrich

The Pink tree of life....

May 27th , 2010

It is going to be hard to say this in the amount of words allowed on facebook so I decided to start my own blog and write about things that mean so much to me. Yesterday was a very inspirational day for me... started out with the cemetery (no worries it is not what you are thinking). I was on my way to a real estate shindig in Bellingham when I pulled off the freeway to get a coffee from Starbucks and OF COURSE I missed the entrance and had to go further down the road which did not have a turn off for a bit. Now you know when a gal from Bellevue needs a coffee… she needs it NOW and being Aries, Spanish and ADHD I might be a little impatient and was not in the mood for waiting. Now I have learned in my life that when you are in a hurry things happen and sometimes they are not good. I had to wait for a long light, a school bus that had to stop for the train tracks, and finally made the light. It did not end there… I had to turn around on that road so I did an illegal move ( u-turn ) hoping that the cops were still at Starbucks getting coffee. No offense… I love you guys! ALL OF THE SUDDEN my A.D.D eyes spotted a pink object to the left in the cemetery. I had to investigate! Of course I missed the cemetery entrance so I did another illegal u-turn. I entered the cemetery on a road that looked like a sidewalk. This resting place is in Marysville Washington. As I got closer to the PINK object I realized it was a BEAUTIFUL tree with tons of flowers on it It was the most beautiful tree I have ever seen… and VERY MUCH ALIVE. The tree beckoned me to stop and visit. Even though my passenger was in a hurry... I stopped to "smell the roses" which happened to be a flowering tree in the middle of the cemetery. There is joy in the most simple things just remember that the simple things are lasting and real.


Now many people would think that I am a nut and that is ok I do what my intuition tells me to do even if it makes me look odd because I may never travel down that same road again. I walk to the beat of a different drummer and am proud (derived from the writings of the American philosopher Henry David Thoreau, who wrote:"If a man loses pace with his companions, perhaps it is because he hears a different drummer. Let him step to the music which he hears, however measured, or far away. " http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Henry_David_Thoreau )

I am happy with who I am.
I will never forget the happiness the pink tree brought me. It started my day with such a great feeling of freedom to do what I want and a great amount of inspiration. Remember to pull over and notice the special things that others might just drive on by. There is so much life and love in the cemetery. Go to Marysville and visit the Pink tree of Life.

I want to thank the Alvestad Family for planting that tree for Emil K.Alvestad and Otelia A. Koehler. I don't know any of you but your love filled my heart on that day with life and love. Thank you from my heart to yours....... Nancy T. Ulrich